Gunman. Elementary School. Sweet Babies aren’t going home to their mommies.

I wasn’t going to post on this today, but it’s the only thing in my head.

It won’t be a long one.

This is my Munch:

Image

I just…I can’t fathom. I don’t fathom. Because it hurts too much to even think about.

The one overwhelming thought to me is that there is literally nothing that will prevent this. Gun control. either stricter or more lax, better law enforcement, better targeting of these sorts of threats…violence, hatred and anger always find a way through.

But I refuse to let it be so for me. I will not live in fear, though I sometimes want to just take my baby and hide as deep and far away as I can. I refuse to harbor anger, because poison like that is best left outside the body. I refuse to allow myself to be anything but the change I want to see in the world. And I refuse, finally, to let my daughter grow up afraid. I will not cripple her with fear or anxiety.

This world is dangerous and scary sometimes, but I will find the beauty. It takes looking for, especially days like today, but I will remember, as I grieve for the precious little ones that lost their lives, the mommies and daddies who will grieve so much longer than you or I, that some mommies and daddies got to take home their babies and hold them safe and squeeze them tighter.

And I will do the same.

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