It’s that time of year.
The silly season has unequivocally arrived.
Plastic Santa’s vie with cardboard gobblers for the same shelf space even as the witches and goblins move to the clearance rack. The political masks are still in place, but hey, those never really go out of style, do they?
From October one forward, I’m never sure which holiday we’re shopping for. Is it the early Christmas shopping season or the post Halloween sale season? Does Thanksgiving even get a season of its own? I get very confused. So, I’ve come to a decision. I am declaring my own holiday. And it shall be called: The UnHoliday Holyday.
On this day, there shall be no shopping, no viewing of schmaltzy or cheesy commercials. (Really – is there any other kind?) Shopping trips to crowded malls where you might get trampled or gouged are verboten. Instead, we are to sit quietly eating chocolate while our favorite music plays in the background and a blessedly efficient stylist gives us a manicure, or a pedicure. Or both.
Alternate forms of celebration are allowed. For instance, you could spend the afternoon pursuing uproarious laughter with the little human of your choice. An afternoon, either romantic or platonic, with your favorite big person is also acceptable. Skydiving, painting, writing, or sculpting may be attempted so long as no stress is involved in the creative process.
The point is, no commercialism is permitted. You may spend money, but only if it is in the pursuit of home-made happiness and only if the vendor used neither Santas, turkeys, nor reindeer in their advertising.
The Unholiday Holyday may be celebrated year-round on the date and at the time of your choice. Tax and license free to all. Not encouraged where prohibited by law. Go forth and celebrate. That is all.